Games Families Play

The word on the street is that Family Game Night can cure what ails your clan. These are the games that you cannot find on the toy shelf at your local WALLLMART. (borrowed from Today's Parent, November 2006):

MOMOPOLY:
object- Players compete to see who can monopolize mom's attention to the exclusion of all other siblings.
how to play - Ignore mother until she's talking to one of your siblings. Interrupt with an urgent request for assistance - with braiding your hair, a permission form to be signed, the proper way to draw a spaceship.
how to win - Make the request that finally sends mom fleeing from the room. Bonus points if she hollers, "Go ask your father!!!"

DUELLING FOR DOLLARS:
object - Players try to reduce mom's or dad's disposable income to zero.
how to play - On payday (or any day), wake parents at dawn and start listing the stuff you need. Five dollars for Hot Dog day or a buck for chocolate milk? Is the field trip or book-order payment almost due? Or maybe you've had your eye on some new running shoes or the latest PS2 game.
how to win - Be the first to wald away with a fistful of cash and a commitment from mom to order pizza for supper.

SCRIBBLE:
object - To make mom or dad wonder why they were so anxious for you to learn to write.
how to play - Using pencils, pens, crayons, markers and even lipstick, print your name. Draw a happy face. Practise your cursive. When you have gone through an entire pad of sticky notes (usually in about 10 minutes), turn to the walls and furniture.
how to win - Be the first to cover the refrigerator and bulletin board with "art". Bonus points if your parents have to haul out the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.

RISKY:
object - To encourage parents' growth of grey hair and facial tics. (Note: toddlers and teens seem to have the upper hand in this game).
how to play - Amaze mom and dad with your daring behaviour. Scale the fridge to see what's on top. Taste the spider plant. Build a skateboard ramp with a brick and a piece of panelling. Find out where the sharp knives are.
how to win - Be the first to get mom or dad to say, "If you break a leg, don't come running to me."

SUZY SAYS:
object - To make your parents' eyes glaze over with boredom.
how to play - After school or during dinner, fill mom and dad in on the events of the day. "And then Suzy says......and I'm like.....and then Johnny comes up and.....so I'm like.....and the teacher's like......". Pause occasionally for breath and be sure to wave your arms for emphasis.
how to win - Get mom or dad to confess that they stopped listening 10 minutes ago.


I thought this was apt, although I do see myself playing any and all of the above mentioned games on any given day. Now, can we invent a game to win with our kids.......